Silvia accompanied me on my second doctor’s visit. Her concerned look as I emerged from the doctor’s office turned fearful as I told her I needed to make an appointment with a neurologist. I knew she was extra sensitive to this type of news, because her mother has been battling multiple sclerosis for some time, and Silvia could sense what I wouldn’t allow my mind to consider.
On Thursday afternoon, July 30th, I made an appointment to see a neurologist for the following Monday morning. I simply needed to wait for the weekend to end, and then I would finally move toward getting some answers. But waiting was not so simple, as my symptoms continued to worsen, and sleeping through the night became a greater challenge. My body was filled with anxiety as I knew something was wrong…something serious. I still could not bring myself to consider ms as a diagnosis, but did begin to seriously consider other maladies such as a brain tumor or cancer.
I was a mess.
The coordination in my right hand and shoulder seemed to deteriorate over the weekend and writing or typing became difficult and frustrating. I had a persistent feeling of cold hugging my head, neck and shoulders…and I just wanted to shiver. My hips and knees continued to feel blocked – like life couldn’t flow through these extremities. A constant pressure settled on my back and made breathing difficult…especially while lying down to try and get some restorative rest. It became difficult to simply rise up and gain my balance as my apathetic right leg just tingled.
I can’t remember the last time I was so happy a weekend ended and Monday morning arrived. I was looking forward to my appointment…looking forward to getting some answers and finally some relief.
Silvia again accompanied me to the doctor’s office and waited as I my examination began…but she knew – she could just sense it!
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